July 28, 2009
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only if..
it was all so easy. The dream of a life I once had where i was calm and happy.
I'm sitting here 26 hours and no sleep. the delirium is setting in and i have scars to prove it.
I'm going to slip soon if i don't do something right.I'm going to starve, and find the meaning of poverty, the meaning of abandonment.
I can't even put into words how i feel. I don't even want to write it because of my shame.I am hiding a monster under my skin and everyone knows its there.
who could i fool?
not even myself.when i saw it thrown into the middle of the street.
when i saw the love drift away from us.
when i felt the pain it felt so intense it took me over and consumed me.im going to fall asleep and wake up to another day.
it will be what i make it. It will be more bearable.
wont it?
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